THE FBI PIZZA CALL

                FROM THE RAID AT THE SOUTHWOOD PSYCHIATRIC HOSPITAL,
                                                         CHULA VISTA, CA 

FBI agents conducted a "search and seizure" at the Southwood Psychiatric Hospital in San Diego, which was under investigation for medical insurance fraud.  After hours of poring over many rooms of financial records, some sixty FBI agents worked up quite an appetite.  The case agent in charge of the investigation called a local pizza parlor with delivery service to order a quick dinner for his colleagues.
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The following conversation took place:

 
      Agent: Hello.  I would like to order nineteen large pizzas and sixty-seven cans of soda.
      Pizza man: And where would you like them delivered?
     
      Agent: To the Southwood Psychiatric Hospital.
      Pizza man: To the psychiatric hospital?
     
      Agent: That's right.  I'm an FBI Agent.
      Pizza man: You're an FBI agent?
     
      Agent: That's correct.  Just about everybody here is.
      Pizza man: And you're at the psychiatric hospital?
     
      Agent: That's correct.  And make sure you don't go through the front doors.  We have them
                  locked.  You'll have to go around back to the service entrance to deliver them.
      Pizza man: And you say you’re all FBI agents?
     
      Agent: That's right.  How soon can you have them here?
      Pizza man: And you're over at Southwood?
     
      Agent: That's right.  How soon can you have them here?
      Pizza man: And everyone over at Southwood is an FBI agent?
     
      Agent: That's right.  We've been here all day and we're starving.
      Pizza man: How are you going to pay for this?
     
      Agent: I have my checkbook right here.
      Pizza man: And you are all FBI agents?
     
      Agent: That's right everyone here is an FBI agent.  Can you remember to bring the pizzas and
                  sodas to the service entrance in the rear?  We have the front doors locked.
      Pizza man: I don't think so. (Click!)
     
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                                                                                                    Wayne A. Barnes
                                                                                                    Special Agent                                                                                                                                        San Diego FBI
                                                                                                    8/27/93  ©